i know this is a post a lot of people have been waiting for. it's been a hard week for everyone, and we've all been shocked and anguished by the events we've lived through, but i reserve the right to feel especially aggrieved. yes, there were 3000 bloggers who had their roots pulled up by the weblogs dot com
blackout, but i think i may have had it worst.
up until last week, i would have counted myself one of the «a-list» bloggers on weblogs.com. a bowl of ivar
was i believed a gravitaceous celestial body in the blogiverse. yet, to my dismay, it wasn't one of the sites that was retained. expressive people invest much ego
in their creative output; to have mine dismissed without a second thought was like the loss of a limb, or a major bodily organ.
i don't think i can sum up my devastation at the blogocide as well as i did in my first e-missive to dave winer, which i excerpt below.
From: ivar pecchuli (email protected)
To: dave winer (email protected)
Date: Tue, June 15, 2004 20:14:03 -0000
Subject: notification please
i note with sadness the discontinuation of the majority of blogs on weblogs.com today. it is an unfortunate incident to say the least; my heart goes out to you. to be frank, though, i believe you did the right thing. the fields of blogging have become clogged somewhat with less-than-fruitful trees. some trimback was in order.
one thing that worries me, though, is that i am no longer able to navigate to «a bowl of ivar» from within my browser. i'm worried that in the rush to eradicate some of the goats of the herd, this sheep's head has accidentally rolled, also. i know that you're planning to preserve the high-profile weblogs.com and i wanted to alert you to this oversight before too many readers complain. this could be a potential public-relations problem for you and i both.
i know that you and i don't share a particularly warm relationship, and perhaps my barbed pen has caught one too many times in your none-too-thick skin. but i hope that you can act professionally and put this task at the head of your to-do list before it boils over. it would be the best thing for our medium (blogging) and each of our public image.
of course, i expected back a near-instant response, then... nothing! i tried my best to ascribe the best intentions to davew's poor show of responsibility, but it became increasingly difficult throughout the day. further email contact was fruitless. finally, i penned another e-message, this time to doc
From: ivar pecchuli (email protected)
To: doc searls (email protected)
Date: Tue, June 15, 2004 20:33:12-0000
Subject: do we have to do something special?
i'm happy to observe that doc.weblogs.com is up and running. good for you!
«a bowl of ivar» remains off-the-air for the time being, though. i haven't been able to figure out the new interface for the remaining weblogs.com sites. after all this time, i thought i was a master of manila, but not even the metablog interface is operable.
dave has been too busy to respond to my increasingly frantic e-posts, and i must have missed the message with the new instructions. (i'm cursing myself for my brief flirtation with gmail -- you probably read my blog post on the subject -- maybe the message went there? i just can't say.) anyways, i'm sure dave would consider it a tribute to your close friendship if you could walk this helpless lamb through the steps of living in the new weblogs.com world.
i have a post itching to be published on the euro parliament election results, and another (of course) to help defend davew from the scurrilous attacks from those so-called bloggers who want to make this into an us-versus-them issue. in this time of trouble, we need to stick together. so, please, the sooner the better on the instructions!
of course, like everyone else who tried to write doc that day, what i got back was a brief out-of-office message and the telephone number of his secretary. she took my name and number but said that docs doesn't normally return overseas calls. i impressed on her the urgency of the situation, but i take it she's not as interested in new media as some others may be. the bleeding edge is a lonely place sometimes.
when davew's audio message
came out, i listened anxiously. yes, yes, but what about me
. i listened three times, and nothing
. that was when i realized that «a bowl of ivar» wouldn't be preserved. i had hoped that dave winer was above this kind of pettiness, but one can't deny the evidence.
wednesday, i stayed in bed and ate foods i shouldn't and tried to distract myself with the racier passages from genet. no luck, of course; doom overhung.
thursday, after some extensive cogitation, i realized that perhaps this was an opportunity in my creative life. i have the new collage i'm working on, for example, and the «wilson in versailles» epic poetry cycle needs some serious attention if it's ever to see publication. (last winter's decision to move to prosodic hexameter is going to mean 5200 lines with one new iambic bisyllable each!) these daunting tasks were begging for my attention. perhaps this was indeed a message from the κόσμως to put down the blogger's pen and turn to more traditional outlets. my only sorrow was that i would never have the chance to say goodbye in the way i'd have liked to.
friday, i couldn't shake the feeling that i'd made a mistake. it felt wrong, to cast away this fascinating medium that we bloggers have created. then, it struck me: yes, it was an opportunity for renewal and reinvention, but in particular an opportunity for renewed and reinvented blogging
thus: this new site. yes, i know i've had little but scornful words for blogspot
in the past, and i can't help feeling that google
, through gmail
, shares some culpability for what happened with «a bowl of ivar». but new times call for new thinking. anyways, i've always thought of evanw
with fondness and consider him a personal friend (though we've never met in «meatspace»).
so i present you with «another
bowl of ivar», if you can stomach it, readers. i can't say that it will be exactly like «a.b.o.i.», but i hope not. it's an enterprise we're embarking on together. let's see where it takes us.